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Parental Support, or is it, Part II

What's on your mind?

by GIMNEPIWO » Tue Dec 30, 2008 6:48 am

"DADDY GOES TO THE BAHAMAS!!!!!"

LMAOWIOAB! ... So, you're pulling for the Liquor Store job? ... One of my DD's did this a few years back ... I didn't understand at first but through talking to her and her sisters I found out she didn't like the Coach ... there is probably some underlying reason, but if it is valid and not mid season, you should be supportive.
"For the strength of the pack is the wolf, the strength of the wolf is the pack" Rudyard Kipling
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by Tucson » Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:08 am

I have been interested in reading about the young lady, Elena, in the OP's article. I am not a BBall person and was not aware of her.

But, I have to say, if my DD had asked for a trainer at age 7 and won every award imaginable in basketball, had grown to 6'4" and committed to UConn, I would have had some kind of fit, if she came home from college after 2 days and gave it all up.

She admits to being a perfectionist and lying about loving basketball. She says that she lied for 5 years, when asked if she felt too much stress.

She is now happy playing college volleyball near home and is not playing any basketball.

I actually have known a few people like her - although, not athletes. But, I see perfectionism in a lot of artists and musicians and many just give up, rather than keep at something that they feel inadequate in.
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by MTR » Tue Dec 30, 2008 11:00 am

Tucson wrote:
But, I have to say, if my DD had asked for a trainer at age 7 and won every award imaginable in basketball, had grown to 6'4" and committed to UConn, I would have had some kind of fit, if she came home from college after 2 days and gave it all up.


Don't think she "asked" for a trainer. Many believe (no first hand knowledge) that it was the parents pushing her as she started playing HS ball in 7th grade, varsity in 8th.

She admits to being a perfectionist and lying about loving basketball. She says that she lied for 5 years, when asked if she felt too much stress.


The local press stayed on her during season every game. If she didn't put up the numbers, something must have been wrong.

At a basketball club dinner a couple of years ago, UD women's BB coach was asked about Elena staying home and going to UD. Coach Martin clearly stated that IF she played college ball, it would more likely be UConn or 'Nova (even though the Wildcats women's program doesn't come close to matching the men's). She very matter-of-factly stated that she would love to have a player of Delle Donne's skill on the team and she would talk to her, but there was absolutely no way she was playing basketball at UD.

She is now happy playing college volleyball near home and is not playing any basketball.

I actually have known a few people like her - although, not athletes. But, I see perfectionism in a lot of artists and musicians and many just give up, rather than keep at something that they feel inadequate in.


I don't think the problem is being inadequate, but the constant expectations of being the best. Supposedly, Elena lights up the most around her sister and maybe the long-term separation that would have accompanied a college career was the switch. She may have just gotten to the point of being tired of satisfying everyone else's ego and concentrated on what makes her happy.

I'm glad to see her make a decision that was to her benefit. I can only imagine the pressure she would have had locally had she opted out of basketball while still in HS.
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