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by NumeroUno » Wed Jan 09, 2019 2:53 pm

Now that my two girls are done with softball, 17 years of it, I think back of things I did and things I wish I would have done differently.

Although being given good advice along the way I sometimes let my emotions takes over. I remember a friend who had a daughter pitch for Arizona, she was as good as it gets . He said because he expected so much he never really enjoyed her college career. He warned me before my girls got to college and I’m thankful he did. I tried my hardest to enjoy every second and for the most part I did. I slipped a few times over the years but I did try.

Travel ball I was tough on my girls. To tough, I’m lucky they continued to play. I saw many kids give it up because their parents expected so much or were just flat out mean and clueless. Their is nothing wrong with hard work and to be disciplined. We need a lot more of that with today’s youth. Let your daughter play the game, she’s going strike out looking with bases loaded, she going to give up a long ball to lose a game and she going a kick a ball in the field more then once. Let it go. Talk about it the next day. Don’t make her feel horrible on the way home from a game. Bottom line all games are made to have fun and enjoy.

What advice do you have ?
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by Chin Music » Wed Jan 09, 2019 6:22 pm

Most of us Dads I’m sure have similar stories of how we’ve calmed down around the game after our kids were done. Guilty! Kinda human nature and easier to say something to your kid that you wouldn’t say to someone else’s. Figured that out pretty early that if I couldn’t relax how could they relax, get better and gain confidence.
Kudos to u Spaz, Uno and all the Dads still involved in the game after their kids careers ended!
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by NumeroUno » Thu Jan 10, 2019 8:59 am

I’d like to hear Sam chime in on this !!!
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by UniqueSports » Thu Jan 10, 2019 10:00 am

Good Advice. Enjoy the good times , get thru the bad. I make it practice to never discuss the game during a long ride home. wait 24 hours, you see things differently.
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by NumeroUno » Thu Jan 10, 2019 10:51 am

UniqueSports wrote:Good Advice. Enjoy the good times , get thru the bad. I make it practice to never discuss the game during a long ride home. wait 24 hours, you see things differently.


Sometimes no most times very hard to do but very good advice.
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by Blind Squirrel » Thu Jan 10, 2019 11:02 am

NumeroUno wrote:
UniqueSports wrote:Good Advice. Enjoy the good times , get thru the bad. I make it practice to never discuss the game during a long ride home. wait 24 hours, you see things differently.


Sometimes no most times very hard to do but very good advice.


What do folks expect of their kid beyond they try their hardest? What more can they do?
10 years from now I'll wish I felt like I do these days.
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by Sam » Thu Jan 10, 2019 11:19 am

I, too, was way too tough on my kid. That was exascerbated by the fact that she was doubly tough on herself. It has adversely affected her for the rest of her life up until now. Its a helpless feeling to know that you can't go back in time with the knowledge you now retain and fix yourself. She says that she still cherishes her time playing softball and I believe her. I know that I still look back on those times very fondly.

I was lucky enough to land some positions as an assistant HS Varsity coach with Roosevelt, Corona, and Webb. I'd like to do it again and be able to devote more time to it. Coaching without any family ties to the team is phenomenal. I think I'm very different than I was before and I definitely learned a lot coaching under Ronnie Smith, especially in dealing with umpires. I was so fortunate to coach under his tutelage.

I also owe a lot to Dave Clark, who taught me unmeasurable lessons regarding the game and its nuances.

Now, I'm not coaching and preparing to get married this year. Gonna work for three more years at my current job and then maybe look for something where I can devote time to coaching softball again as well.

If your kid is playing, have your significant other video your behavior during game day. It may help you realize how well your are parenting your kid. I wish somebody would have done that for me.
Run your mouth when I'm not around
Its easy to achieve
You cry to weak friends that sympathize
- Pantera, Walk
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by UniqueSports » Thu Jan 10, 2019 11:27 am

well said my friend.
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by Blind Squirrel » Thu Jan 10, 2019 11:41 am

Sam wrote:I, too, was way too tough on my kid. That was exascerbated by the fact that she was doubly tough on herself. It has adversely affected her for the rest of her life up until now. Its a helpless feeling to know that you can't go back in time with the knowledge you now retain and fix yourself. She says that she still cherishes her time playing softball and I believe her. I know that I still look back on those times very fondly.

I was lucky enough to land some positions as an assistant HS Varsity coach with Roosevelt, Corona, and Webb. I'd like to do it again and be able to devote more time to it. Coaching without any family ties to the team is phenomenal. I think I'm very different than I was before and I definitely learned a lot coaching under Ronnie Smith, especially in dealing with umpires. I was so fortunate to coach under his tutelage.

I also owe a lot to Dave Clark, who taught me unmeasurable lessons regarding the game and its nuances.

Now, I'm not coaching and preparing to get married this year. Gonna work for three more years at my current job and then maybe look for something where I can devote time to coaching softball again as well.

If your kid is playing, have your significant other video your behavior during game day. It may help you realize how well your are parenting your kid. I wish somebody would have done that for me.


Sam, I wish you all the happiness in the world with your upcoming marriage. The youth softball world depends on people like you. I can never adequately compensate the folks like you that generously, selflessly gave their time and effort to help my kid.

My Sincerest Best Wishes,

John Pappas (ex-softball parent and cognitively compromised never-was old man)
10 years from now I'll wish I felt like I do these days.
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by curveballerguy124 » Thu Jan 10, 2019 12:58 pm

You know guys my kids are done my older daughter graduates college this year and my younger daughter is a freshman in college now getting ready for her first college softball season. I'm still coaching I'm finishing my last season at 18U with my remaining girls its bittersweet. There were so many good people I met along the way so many memories and lots of mistakes made, if I knew then what I know now....

For that reason I figured I would drop to the younger age group and start all over again. See if I can't help some of the younger kids and parents not make the same mistakes I made and watched other parents make. See if I can't help them enjoy the ride more and teach some of these kids the important stuff about the game. Softball has been good to me and to my girls. I just thought I'd stick around and give a little something back, and maybe talk a few parents off the ledge from time to time!!!
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