Discussing Concerns With Parent

[Coach11]

Hey Gang.....followed you all over here from the Eteamz board. Place looks like it's more condusive to actual discussion.

Anyway.....looking for advice on speaking to a parent about having his daughter, a pitcher, wear a face mask. She's 14U, and in this neck-of-the-wood there aint a whole lotta girls wearing them. I have a feeling she will not be very receptive to the idea.

She's a solid pitcher, with real potential....what she lacks is reflexes.

I have been on the sidelines for the past two seasons, and have watched her take 3 or 4 comebackers pretty hard. She got partial glove on a one of 'em. Luckily, all were below the shoulders.

I'll be taking the reigns this year, and her safety is a true concern for me.

Father is a good guy....but he's very protective of his daughters feelings. I don't want to make him go on the defensive. Aside from her stuff in the circle, she's one of the weaker players on the team. I believe he recognizes this and almost has a knee-jerk reaction to anything he perceives as criticism. Not sure why her HS coach hasn't pushed for this. (Maybe he has and she's decided against it?)

Any advice from those who've been down this road before?

EDITED CAUSE I CAN'T SPELL WORTH A LICK.

[Sparky Guy]

What you should do is suggest all the pitchers wear one for the reasons you stated. Then point out that you've seen So-And-So take some hard comebacker hits and you'd hate to see any of the girls get hurt. I wouldn't hold my breath. At 14U they are more worried about how they look than being safe.

You can also do some drills to help her learn how to react. Often it's not a matter of reacting, but rather recognizing it quicker and moving to defend herself. If she's practiced defending herself she'll be quicker to do it when it happens for real. Also, I see too many girls finish their pitch and not be in a position to defend themselves. Their glove hand will be down and their body position is wrong. If that is the case then tell dad to have her pitching instructor work on the finish so she's ready to defend herself.

From 12U all the way through her last year in college I would work reaction drills with my daughter several times each year. Thankfully she never took a real hard shot. She was always able to get a glove on the ball and catch it or knock it down. There were a couple of close calls, but never any injuries. The other thing that helped was she always ended up in a good defensive position with her glove above the waist and open ready to catch a ball.

One of her college team pitchers was so bad at defending herself; one time she was hit in the thigh on her glove side so hard the ball glanced upwards high enough for the shortstop to catch it like an easy popup. I don't know how, but she finished the game. She a real bad limp for few days afterwards with the expected bruise. That was one of several I saw in the two years I saw her pitch.

[Scoop n K]

Coach,
I guess it all depends on how you frame it. Wearing a mask is NO KNOCK on the kid's abilities. I've seen plenty of very athletic players take one off the noggin and it ain't pretty! I make my DD wear a mask when pitching and playing third. She was reluctant at first, thought it "looked wierd". After she started wearing it, two others on her team started using theirs (which had previously sat in their equipment bags). I've been thanked by both sets of parents for setting the example. The best thing is, last Sunday, the mask did it's job by saving at least some lost teeth. As far as I am concerned, allowing your kids to play tight, with todays composite bats and strong hitters, is asking for trouble.
I'd let the parent know that your primary concern is for the kids safety ( and perhaps, limiting your liability) while she is under your control. Any parent that takes that and turns it into a negative is beyond help anyway! We've all seen the few major League baseball pitchers that have had their career ended or severely impacted because of hard come-backer. They have 60' 6" to react, our girls have 40' or so and are still developing. Do the kid a favor and insist she start getting used to wearing it. You may even find that her defensive confidence increases. I did.

[GIMNEPIWO]

Scoop n K sez:
"They have 60' 6" to react, our girls have 40' or so and are still developing."

I would like to add that after the pitch, the gals are maybe 35' from the dish ... but even potentially closer than that from the point of impact ... and it's a battle to get some to wear a mouth guard...

[carsdad]

The face mask is by far the cheapist insurance policy you can buy. $ 35.00 face mask oooorrrrr $ 3500.00 dental bill. not to mention the pain that goes with taking 1 to the mouth or face area...

[hit4power]

You will be the coach, just make it a team rule that pitchers and 3B wear a mask. That's how it is on DD's TB team. No discussion, its just a rule. Also, the suggestion to work with pitchers on defensive positioning and reflexes is a good one. DD's TB coach will stand behind the catcher while each pitcher pitches and as the ball crosses the plate he will throw a ball back at the pitcher to simulate a come-backer or line drive. They learn pretty quick to finish their delivery in a good defensive posture and be ready for whatever might come.

[play-more/talk-less]

I agree with the others all good advice. My advice if you feel that strongly about it enforce it or don't let her pitch if they refuse the mask. This is a game you are concerned for her safety and that is the most important thing.

[3Bsnag]

Let me play devils advocate...

The coach is not going to tell me or my kid what equipment to wear, other than the required team uniforms. Especially, at 14U. That decision is the sole responsibility of the parents, not the kid and not the coach. You can choose to mandate, I can choose not to play with your team.

I do feel it is your responsibility as the coach to bring up your issues with the parent, whether they become offended or not.

What if the coach mandated shin pads, knee pads, elbow guards, heart guard chest protectors, and ankle braces?

[etx bd]

Coach
I have to ask how good a pitcher is she? If she is getting nailed that often it sounds like she does not have any spin and is just firing the ball down the middle. If thats the case she needs some help with her pitches - because while it is important for a pitcher to be protected - it is unusual to get that many shots straight back at her. Maybe talk to her pitching coach?

[Tucson]

I also advocate the face mask.

I have only been successful in getting 2 girls out of about 50, recently to wear them. (I carry them to my lessons and educate the parent and the girl.)

These girls are only 8-10 YOs and they still will not wear them.

I don't see the problem. I wear one to catch with and yesterday an 8 YO hit me twice in the face. (The ball hit something on the ground once and then she hit the bucket.) But, anyway, she saw how well the face mask protected me.

When I am wearing the Gameface, I even forget that I have it on. I guess I have used it about 3 years.

I agree with those that said put them on 3rd and pitcher. Plus,just put them on all infielders. The base runner is coming into the base with head gear on, why not get them on all your infielders?

Do those of you that advocate the face masks think that the coach should buy them? I would rather not, but if I was mandating a $40.00 item........

Oh, also, my DD is 20 - but when she was little, I used to hit her line drives to the head area every morning while we waited on the school bus. She loved it and it made her a very good fielder. (And that was before facemasks.)

Good luck.